Guard My Heart and Mind

I have had nightmares the last two nights. I don't often have nightmares and to have them two nights in a row has me thinking. I don't know if I am under a spiritual attack or if they are a sign or if I am just anxious.

Last night my nightmare started off with me and my parents going to take the ASVAB together. They felt the need to take it to compare themselves to me. I just remember feeling inadequate in comparison to them. Somehow I end up on a train in Japan trying to call my mom to tell her I wouldn't be able to take the test. I couldn't call her though, my phone was out of minutes. I was desperate to get in touch with her and couldn't. I wasn't even able to use a credit card to pay to talk to her. The train was moving fast and I had to make a decision to get off or stay on. I get off. I get out and everyone is looking at this cloud approaching. It turns into a tornado and everyone runs in panic to find shelter. I am left all alone. All of a sudden this American girl drives up and spins her car in front of me and the passenger side opens to me and she yells at me to get in. I do. We drive off in this storm with hail and debris all around us, she has a phone and yells for me to call my mom. Then I wake up. 

Tonight I dreamt I was working at a secure military facility. There is a guy that walks in and I recognize him. I don't know him personally but I see he is evil and nervous. Then a team of these terrorist walk in and I try to alert everyone we are under attack. It is too late. They have this other girl and dismember her and sew aircraft wings onto her back. I am being held down and watching this then I pass in and out of consciousness and they are doing the same thing to me. When I wake up I have these large B2 stealth bomber wings on my back. Then I wake up, sweating. 

I have looked up certain key pieces from these dreams. Tornado is expressing chaos or being overwhelmed.  Being in a foreign country means something unfamiliar like a change in routine or a job.  To dream of being attacked indicates that my character is being questioned, I feel the need to defend myself, or that I may be facing difficult changes in real life. Being dismembered means removing parts of your life that you have trouble with, or are struggling with new changes. 

All of these make sense to me, but they seem so violent. That is what makes me think it could be a spiritual attack. I have heard that once you start an action moving towards what God wants you to do, forces of evil will try and stop you. 

I know that I truly am scared for these changes that are about to happen. It's the fear of the unknown. The fear of serving during this time with everything going on in our country. The fear that our nation is turing evil and I will be forced obey orders that go against what God says. The fear of being separated from my husband. 

I truly feel this is something I am supposed to do. I have this picture that I will be able to help people in third world countries through military volunteer opportunities. I ideally want to be a dental assistant, it all depends on my ASVAB score and the needs of the Navy. I have this vision where I get to assist with cleft palate operations and other dental facial surgeries. I bring joy and love and hope with me to a hopeless people. 

Once I woke up from my nightmare I began to pray for peace of mind. I sent my mom a text message about the dreams and she replied with a prayer. I turned on my praise music and looked up Bible verses on peace. 

Isaiah 54:10 Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the LORD, who has compassion on you.

Isaiah 55:12 You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees will clap their hands.

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give peace as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. 

John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." 

Romans 15:13 May the God of hope fill you with all the joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 

I serve a BIG God. Bigger than my fears, bigger than any evil spirits, bigger than doubt.

Lord I pray to be lost in You. Let me pray continually. Bring peace of mind to me. May Your peace guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Thank You for the work You are doing in me. Thank You for the work that You will allow to be done through me. Let me be invisible so that all that is visible is You.